ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
