No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
