maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
