Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
