It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
