So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
