Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
