Do you still have your period?
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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