For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Success! We fucked roommates!
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