you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i wish my penis had a tongue
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
