Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize