Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
