just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
