So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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