Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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