yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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