Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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