Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
