I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
