Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
