Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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