hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize