Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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