She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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