Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I feel like a drive thru vagina
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
