She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
A+ Viking dick
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
