David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
