Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize