You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize