idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Acid is not a monday night drug
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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