I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
