I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
