Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
