Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
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