So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
