You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
