Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize