office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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