I'm going to jail i love you
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize