in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
