After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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