but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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