Only a mothe r could love this liver
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
