Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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