What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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