He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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