I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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