dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Randomize
