oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
