Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
This baby is an asshole
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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